Love Languages

My best friend Aimee asked me the other day if I’d watched the most recent episode of Jane the Virgin. This evening I caught myself up and finished watching episode fifty-four! I promise I won’t spoil anything, I just wanted to reflect on a scene that is very relevant to my life currently. In this clip Jane and Michael are standing in the door way of their home ready to part ways for the day. Michael is off to take the LSAT and Jane to confront a publisher. Their interaction was such a light I had to rewind the scene and play it again. If you’ve ever heard of the 5 Love Languages (L.L.) by  Gary Chapman, I think he would be proud of Jane. In that moment Jane might have been able to check off all five L.L. (including the food love language which we consider the sixth L.L. in our house). I quickly thought about my interactions with Tim in the morning and replayed our typical situation as we both depart in the morning. I don’t say anything affirming. I probably don’t kiss him goodbye because we’re in the middle of an argument, and I definitely don’t pack his lunch is his perfect version of a lunch pale. Tim and I have been in a windy season. Our comments, expectations, and hurts blowing around us both. It’s exhausting. I don’t know how so many people have managed the conversation of ‘who does what’ in marriage and not left us young folk any sound advice. Unpacking Ephesians 5 in this day and age is hard to grapple with. Seriously. How do we navigate this? Not to mention gender roles, feminism… After the conclusion of episode fifty-four, I thought back to Jane in that moment and asked myself, how could I be like this woman in respecting and encouraging my husband? How could affirming him, making and packing his lunch, and kissing him goodbye touch on my dreams and goals that I feel God has placed in my life? Calling all wives!

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